Thursday was of course Thanksgiving and of course the tradition dinner at family complete with the traditional lousy football game from Detroit. The Lions got trounced by about 40 points, I lost count the game was so uninteresting. The Detroit Lions have become the NFL traditional also-ran, never winning enough to get fans here in Detroit excited, yet they still amazingly attend games. The Lions last won the football championship back in 1957, so I've never witnessed the Lions win it all. And somehow I don't suspect I will before I die.
The day after Thanksgiving is the traditional first day of Christmas shopping, a day I've traditionally tried to avoid participating in. But I got dragged down to a few stores this year. The traffic was the traditional backed-up mess and parking was traditionally full. I ended up in a few traditional check-out lines, but all in all it wasn't the worst experience I've ever had. I kept up a good patter of mischief and humor to make the time more interesting.
Over the weekend I succumbed to helping put up outdoor Christmas lights. Now this is one tradition I nearly abhor. I have no problem viewing OTHER peoples light displays, but standing out in the cold trying to unravel cords and get everything attached correctly can drive me traditionally batty. Our house has no shrubs or trees in the front yard, so all the lighted amusements go into the ground. At night it looked fairly good, but in the day all the cords stretched across the yard look funky, if you ask me.
And then the most depressing amusement from all the electrical display is watching the power meter spin faster. I've tried arguing that all this electrical usage is bad for our society as well as our bank account, but to no avail. You see my woman is a Christmas traditionalist, at least as traditions go for the baby boomer generation. I've tried convincing her that Jesus didn't have electric, the manger was powerless. Well I guess I'm just a tradionalist as well, because as any man knows if the woman wants something badly then it's better just to help and keep the peace.
I did offer an alternative electrical yard idea that didn't go over too well. Lighted terrorists display. That was met with a stern look, so I suggested lighted yard aliens which to me would seem more like something that should be all lighted up, sort of like Close Encounters Of The Third Kind. With that idea rejected, I was certain I should just shut up. This is another holiday tradition, that when my strange humor starts getting old, it is time to be nice.
The next tradition for this time of year is the annual first day of snow. Most people around here look forward to winter and snow, I pray for temporary global warming or as Republicans call it, global climate change. To me snow in the city is just a plain nusaince. It slows traffic, road salt starts crusting on the car, and the car gets that black ice sludge chunk hanging behind the wheel wells. And the sides of roads get that car exhaust colored black snow, simply beautiful. These are northern traditions in cities and I could do without them.
Oh, the weather outside is frightful,
some call that snow delightful,
but in the city it's time to go,
when it snows, when it snows, when it snows!